Here are a bunch of random quotes from Bizarre Creations staff members at various points throughout the company's history. We add to this list when somebody says something which is clever/stupid/random/funny/etc. Enjoy!

• Just as I said Karma was going to bite me back, I dropped my banana (07/05/08)
• They had hello kitty sick bags too... shoot me. (01/05/08)
• It's like saying "even though Lily Savage is a man, she's still incredibly fit" (30/04/08)
• Fancy some multiplayer love? (16/04/08)
• This is getting too gay for me to continue participating in (18/03/08)
• If you're having trouble with your girlfriend, come and see me. (17/03/08)
• I went to get water, and came back with two beers, a yoghurt, and a chocolate eclair (29/02/08)
• Yu-Gi-Oh is the MacGyver of the card world (29/02/08)
• Pregnant women gamers - the untapped demographic (19/02/08)
• It looks like he's copulating with your desk (18/02/08)
• From behind she looks like a fat Seager (12/02/08)
• It's like that scene in Swordfish, but instead of a hot girl it's a jaffa cake on your hand. (12/02/08)
• Geometry Wars is about rocks because Geometry is a study of rocks (12/02/08)
• Keep your plums away from me, Brian! (11/02/08)
• You expect to be bummed, and if you're not then it's a pleasant suprise! (11/02/08)
• Your underpants don't make geometric sense (31/01/08)
• 'So tell me, what's morale like at Bizarre?' 'Who's Morale?' (13/09/07)
• ...And they'll all take your picture and you'll trip over your high heels just like in Disney cartoons (12/09/07)
• I could really do without seeing the contents of your innards (03/09/07)
• Please note: Top shelf magazines are not welcome (03/09/07)
• The best thing about this game mode is that you can play it one-handed... (09/08/07)
• The guy thought I was taking my vacuum cleaner for a romantic walk in the park (07/08/07)
• I am Pentium of Borg. Arithmetic is futile. You will be approximated. (28/06/07)
• Never freeze a locator, and never widdle on an electric fence (14/06/07)
• Unfortunately, being well spoken doesn't stop you being a pervert... (05/06/07)
• X, as in the X button... not a kiss. (31/05/07)
• Bruce Willis' corpse would still kick Chuck Norris' ass (16/06/07)
• Dude!! We have a spoon drawer!! (16/06/07)
• Hey, I can feel your hard disk (14/06/07)
• Everyone here is too fat for Ninja work (17/04/07)
• 'Wort Wort Wort', in Halo 2 that means 'Wort Wort Wort'. (13/04/07)
• Ohhhh, Eunuchs! I thought you meant Unix! (05/04/07)
• I just stepped on an arrow and it didn't give me a speed boost! (01/04/07)
• You look like a tellytubby on ecstacy (29/03/07)
• He's like a fly when the poo has all been eaten (28/03/07)
• 'Yes Ben, I do find you sexier than Chris' -Steve, March 2007 (21/03/07)
• If there is no follow up I'll drink a pint of horse semen and put it on YouTube! (07/03/07)
• Wiping your arse won't help if you've already crapped yourself. (03/02/07)
• I'll happily wear an arse on my head as long as it's made by Nintendo. (02/02/07)
• Ste in a skirt is not a real girl. (29/01/07)
• I found myself waking up on New Years Day in a village 15 miles from my house, on the floor in a room full of people I didn't know, covered in lipstick and smeared with pizza. True story. (02/01/07)
• I'm sure I spoke to you this morning and you weren't gay. (13/12/06)
• That's quite disturbing that the resonant frequency of your balls is the same as my arse. (03/12/06)
• I'm not going to a meeting in Ken's bed... (24/11/06)
• 'I don't have any led in my pencil!' *offers eraser* 'No need for a rubber if I ain't got led!' (22/11/06)
• I don't trust any registry keys from you, especially if they're sexually motivated. (20/11/06)
• It's so quick and easy to do: Google, 'gay porn', set as background (15/11/06)
• If there's one girl from the Internet you should totally get with, it's her (12/11/06)
• Cock's more fun (10/11/06)
• It's here, on my desk, hot and full... (does that sound like a line from a porno?) (03/11/06)
• I bought one, but, I couldn't find any games I wanted to play. Their themes seemed to revolve around using the stylus to anally pleasure Mario (01/11/06)
• I find your lack of Baywatch knowledge disturbing (30/10/06)
• Those dirty balls have stained my hands (29/10/06)
• James Bond sex should never be shown onscreen (12/10/06)
• Two things not to skimp on - toilet roll and power supplies for PC's (11/10/06)
• I'm not touching it, but I'll watch... (10/10/06)
• Hope your night has more rock than a Blackpool sweet shop (09/10/06)
• These gatherings do feature a calibre of geek above and beyond the accepted norm. (05/10/06)
• Warning: do not confuse the phrases "The Daddy" and "Dog's Danglies". It doesn't work. (28/09/06)
• Makefile Makefile never ever break file (19/09/06)
• Ged's not a gentle tickler... (15/09/06)
• Press this button combination to see Stephen Cakebread naked (09/09/06)
• half maxCocSize = 8.0f; (06/09/06)
• What the eye doesn't see, the programmer gets away with. (05/09/06)
• Getting you alone is easy. Getting a straight answer out of you is like trying to throw a car to the moon. (31/08/06)
• What the hell does my age have to do with Jamie Lee Curtis? (31/08/06)
• I'd rather be gay with Sagat than T-Hawk... (31/08/06)
• I think Medusa has an unfair advantage. (29/08/06)
• There are obviously errors in the spreadsheet. (25/08/06)
• This never would have happened if we'd had photos of you kissing babies... (21/08/06)
• I have a question to ask you, and it's nothing to do with hugs or Linux. (18/08/06)
• It would be like you're pure naked, and everyone's playing with you. (16/08/06)
• Were you fiddling with my knobs this morning? (26/07/06)
• Sorry, I don't bite... on the first date. (24/07/06)
• This resulted in Google Images showing you that I am an armless ghost. (20/07/06)
• I can't wait till we can get our brain implanted into robots. I'd be building jumping all day. (20/07/06)
• In your headset you're doing the 100 meters in Daley Thompson's Decathlon, but in reality you're about to run into a door. (19/07/06)
• I hate to interrupt, but look at that pink Smart Car! (17/07/06)
• I've got more pies than fingers (14/07/06)
• It's like talking to a Japanese schoolgirl. But with less tentacles though... (11/07/06)
• I'd be battering a zombies head in with a rubber sword, but it'd probably take my head off. (07/07/06)
• I think dungeons don't feature enough in the modern man's life (07/07/06)
• To be honest, just by looking at the name I can't tell if it's a man or woman... and I'm scared to ask. (05/07/06)
• I'm trying to ignore your nipples by concentrating on the Italian herb and cheese... (05/07/06)
• Having robots shouting at you is so much cooler than having Roger shouting at you! (11/05/06)
• What is the plural of nipple? (02/05/06)
• Making love to a woman is much like making love to a pair of socks... (02/05/06)
• I'm not joking, the milk just disappeared. We all saw it. (25/04/06)
• BanStick - 2 weeks. Breaking the 'Dont be an asshat' rule (21/04/06)
• I'm not dating a goat! (18/04/06)
• Quit asking Ste to make monkey porn! (13/04/06)
• You weren't Rolling on the Floor Laughing, you were just sat at your desk smiling. Please use the smiley character in the future. Cheers. (11/04/06)
• If the man can't blog, he'll have to kill. (07/04/06)
• Wanna see my hairy bits? (07/04/06)
• I never gamble on races since Mark bet on a horse which fell over and had to be shot in the face... (07/04/06)
• It's like Event Horizon... only with pies. (31/03/06)
• That's the problem with wireless joypads - when you throw them they just keep bouncing! (28/03/06)
• It's like a Swiss bank account, but with legs... (14/03/06)
• It looks better when it's thicker (07/03/06)
• Trust you to come up with a colourful lubricant-based animal pun (06/03/06)
• Oooo... it looks angry... (06/03/06)
• It's a wrong 'un! (06/03/06)
• Nothing better than a borehole! (24/02/06)
• I don't care if she's your sister, she's hot! (20/02/06)
• You managed to pick my housemate, my best mates girlfriend, my best mates sister, my sister and my ex-fiancee... (20/02/06)
• The market is ready for an effective porno game (17/02/06)
• Insert fruit here (10/02/06)
• If Gareth calls me a teste one more time... (09/02/06)
• No Roger, bikini Wednesday's are not sensible (19/01/06)
• The female orcs in World of Warcraft are fit (13/12/05)
• It's not phlegm, it's my juice! (13/12/05)
• Haven't you got broadbang yet? (13/12/05)
• You haven't been watching gay parrot porn again have you? (08/12/05)
• Robots don't help people... they kill people. (08/12/05)
• That's like asking a blind dog if he knows his way to an eskimo! (29/11/05)
• Satyriasis is excessive, abnormal, or uncontrollable sexual/romantic behavior, desire, and excitement in the male (15/11/05)
• You starred out my s***! (15/11/05)
• A moose by any other name is still a moose (02/11/05)
• Who's that girl, and why is she so hot?!? (02/11/05)
• Oooh, that's massive! I'm running away! (01/11/05)
• It's not called a screenshot if it's real life! (28/10/05)
• Sorry that was going to be a yawn but a belch hijacked it (27/10/05)
• Theres only one knob, and I'm twiddling it (26/10/05)
• So you love me? I knew that already!!! (20/10/05)
• I'd just like to point out I'M COMPILING! (19/10/05)
• So we need to shoot all the muppets, and clone Phil... (19/10/05)
• There's nothing to be scared of, it's only aliens! (18/10/05)
• You know you're in trouble when you've got DHTML, JS, and PHP all on the same line. (11/10/05)
• So are we going to cross this road, or just look at it? (11/10/05)
• He's a 'wuss', a 'sissy', and 'really not as cool as all you guys that are going out drinking'. (07/10/05)
• He just likes TOUCHING people! (26/09/05)
• It's the most powerful games console in the world, and you left it in Burger King! (12/09/05)
• Eat my cheese! (02/09/05)
• In the meantime, I'm going to pretend that I'm Billie Jean (23/08/05)
• These transparent barriers are hard to see... (19/08/05)
• Help help, I'm drowning in hamspoon emails! (18/08/05)
• I get mistaken for Adrian Edmondson and Rik Mayall (18/08/05)
• 10 Programmer Minutes are worth about 2 days (10/08/05)
• Can I have one of your melons? (09/08/05)
• I feel like my entire wardrobe of clothes makes me look like a tramp. (08/08/05)
• It's all good for the immune system. It'll only make you stronger. (05/08/05)
• You can cut the tension here with a cricket stump! (05/08/05)
• Two rabbits are humping in the garden! (03/08/05)
• Quick... someone say something funny! (03/08/05)
• Long live Camp David! (26/07/05)
• I've already had a nibble on two of Lisa's... (22/07/05)
• Yep, I can barely move... (17/07/05)
• Home run!!!! (17/07/05)
• Come on n00bz, time to get school'ed (17/07/05)
• I think a dog just wee'd on your Doritos... (17/07/05)
• Sadly my bits are fully functional so I can't sing along with you (14/07/05)
• There's nothing like a man with silicon implants standing in a waterfall (14/07/05)
• Your name will also go on ze list (14/07/05)
• I don't care what it sounds like! (14/07/05)
• We're having fun! (14/07/05)
• Is that bacon I can smell? .... Oh no, It's Mark! (12/07/05)
• I couldn't scrape off the image of He-Man glued to the back (11/07/05)
• She looks like the kind of girl who'd have diseases (06/07/05)
• A triangle is a 3 sided polygon... (06/07/05)
• If you were a parameter, and you had an interface, what would you want your interface to be? (05/07/05)
• If I'm busy hassle Lisa! (05/07/05)
• Are you using the Microsoft Stripper... (01/07/05)
• Where's all the NUMBERS?? There's no NUMBERS! (01/07/05)
• I've got cache flow problems! (11/06/05)
• I'm a lean, mean, optimising machine! (12/06/05)
• That was just a tactical chunder... (11/06/05)
• Smell that television! (10/06/05)
• It handles like a big, fat spherical cow (09/06/05)
• Oh Christ... now we've gone and lost the world again. (08/06/05)
• It'll all be ok in the end... (31/05/05)
• When I was young my family were so poor that they couldn't afford a vocoder. (2005)
• The only reason I took a camera to E3 was for booth babes... (31/05/05)
• Never drink the random purple beverage, it hurts (18/05/05)
• Space Munky's (16/05/05)
• Waheey! (16/05/05)
• Where First Prize is your life! (1991)
• Wayward wabbits (1990)
• There was a cheat, but we've got no idea what it does! (16/05/05)
• Commando Capers in this Crazy Combat Chaos! (1988)
• All the plats, first time. (17/05/05)
• It's being updated soon, I swear! (16/05/05)
• Life begins at 170mph!! (14/05/05)
• The secret's in the sauce... (16/05/05)
• Pumpkins are fun... (16/05/05)